Snowbound Targets (HQR Romantic Suspense) Page 9

  He covered her hand with his. “It’ll get better. I promise.”

  Just like that, the atmosphere changed, becoming charged. Their gazes locked, and she swore she could hear his heart pounding just as hard as hers. Neither moved, frozen in place, and for one breathtaking second, she just knew he was about to lean forward and capture her mouth with his.

  Instead, he blinked and looked away. Clumsily inserting the key into the ignition, he started the engine. “Are you ready?” he asked without looking at her, his voice rusty.

  “I am.” She couldn’t help but feel a bit sad.

  Shaking that off, she watched as he drove out of the garage onto the cleared area. Putting the Jeep in Park, he also engaged the parking brake. “Be right back,” he said.

  He went around to the front and lowered the plow. When he got back into the Jeep, his brown eyes sparkled. “Here we go,” he said.

  They made several passes, driving down and then up, before taking a trip back down. “There we go,” he announced happily. “We can now get out!”

  “Today?” she asked hopefully. “Maybe we could go into town and have something to eat later.”

  He shook his head grimly. “Not a good idea. Not yet, at least. If we do anything like that, we’re going to have to go farther away, like Colorado Springs or something. I don’t want anyone in town recognizing you and knowing you’re with me.”

  Hurt stabbed her at first. But then she realized he wanted her to stay hidden for her own safety. If someone was looking for her, the less she was seen, the more difficult it would be for them to find her.

  “Thanks,” she said.

  “Sure. We’ll figure something out for tomorrow.” Parking again, he went out and raised up the plow before returning to back the Jeep into the garage. Once he’d killed the engine, he turned to her and smiled. “Come on. I think we’ve earned a couple of mugs of hot cocoa, don’t you?”

  I prefer tea. Darjeeling, to be exact. Another thought from nowhere. One more tidbit of self-knowledge that she’d keep to herself for now. “Sure,” she replied. “Cocoa sounds great.”

  The afternoon slipped by, more quickly than it should have. They played cards and she offered to cook the evening meal. He shrugged and told her to knock herself out. So she did, rummaging in the refrigerator, trying to decide what to make.

  He set the table while she cooked. She decided on turkey burgers and sweet potato fries. Both were premade and frozen, but simple to make. She baked the fries while cooking the turkey burgers. She’d been pleasantly surprised at how good they tasted once fried up in a skillet. When she’d found them in the box in the freezer, they’d looked so unappetizing that she’d almost given them a hard pass. Instead, deciding to take a chance, she’d gone ahead and cooked them. And hadn’t been disappointed.

  Quick and easy meal. And healthy too.

  After they’d cleaned up, they watched the news again, like an old married couple. As the news announcer came on, Lucy tried not to get anxious, but she couldn’t help but worry that she’d see something that would set off another panic attack. Unfortunately, she wouldn’t have any warning because she had no idea what might be a trigger.

  Thankfully, the news ended without anything happening, though she couldn’t have repeated what the program had been about. Next, a talk show came on. She tried to watch but had no idea who most of the guest were, never mind the host, so she let her mind wander.

  Sitting on the comfortable sofa that also served as her bed, she must have dozed off. Because the next thing she knew, she was standing in what appeared to be a hotel room, gazing out the window. The view seemed comprised of buildings, some of them old and in various stages of deterioration. She got a sense of age, and also danger.

  Behind her, someone spoke. A man, though she never turned to see his face. His cultured voice whipped into her, the thin veneer of civility undercut with a fine thread of cruelty. She couldn’t quite make out the words, but knew they were full of hurt and scorn.

  Once, she might have felt pain. But now she only felt tired. She regretted coming on this trip with him, regretted agreeing to give them one more chance. She glanced down at her left hand, relieved to see no ring. At least she hadn’t married him. With a start, she realized she felt nothing. Not love, not anger or regret. Just...nothing. She felt split in two, observing herself from a distance, hoping something would give her a hint of something, anything. Her name. Where she was? The name of the man.

  Suddenly, she couldn’t stop shivering. The force of the tremors shook her awake. She blinked, wrapping her arms around herself, icy cold.

  Taking deep, ragged breaths, she looked around her, gradually realizing where she was. Jason’s cabin. The television on, though Jason was nowhere in sight. Not in the living room or the kitchen.

  Suddenly deeply, irrationally worried, she pushed to her feet and went looking for him.

  The bathroom door was open, the light out. He wasn’t there. Since his bedroom was the only other space in the cabin, and the door sat half-open, she pushed it open.

  Sitting cross-legged on the bed, Jason looked up in surprise when she entered. He wore no shirt, and his muscular chest gleamed in the dim light from the bedside table. A small silver laptop rested on his thighs.

  “Are you OK?” he asked, instantly concerned.

  Mouth dry, she found herself at a loss for words. But instead of backing out with a murmured apology or excuse, she stood frozen in place, unable to move. “What are you doing?” she croaked.

  He held up his computer. “Reviewing some of the shots I took while I was in Kabul. You were resting so peacefully that I didn’t want to disturb you.”

  Unable to help it, she shuddered. “I had a dream. It wasn’t bad, not exactly. But it wasn’t good either.” She gave him a brief description.

  Something flickered across his expression when she mentioned the man, and smoothed out when she spoke of her relief that she hadn’t married him. “That must mean I’m single, right?” she asked, her voice weak. If she’d been healthy and whole, she knew nothing on earth would have stopped her from launching herself across the room onto the bed and tackling him.

  “Maybe,” he replied carefully. “If you really think it was more than a dream.” His steady gaze watched her. “Do you?”

  Lord knew she wanted to say yes. She practically ached with the need. “I think so,” she said, which was the best she could do without telling an outright lie. Hopeful, though she had no idea why, she waited for his response.

  “That’s good.” He looked from her to his laptop, and back again. “Do you want to help me look through these? You’re welcome to hop up here, or we can go in the kitchen if you’d rather.”

  Her cheeks were heating and she suddenly lost her courage. “I think I’ll just go to sleep.” She covered her mouth, faking a yawn. “I’m really tired.”

  “OK. Sleep well.”

  “You too.” Finally, she made her legs move and backed out of the room, closing the door quietly after her.

  Standing by the couch, she grabbed the remote and clicked off the television. Looking down at her hands, she wasn’t surprised to realize they were shaking.

  Letting herself drop down into the soft cushions, she covered her face with her hands. What the hell was wrong with her? She should be confused. She should be worried. Instead, all she could think of was how badly she wanted Jason. She wanted his arms around her, to taste the salt of his skin, to feel him move deep inside, filling her up.

  Her entire body burned. They’d discussed this. They both knew neither of them could complicate things, that she had enough to worry about and figure out without adding a relationship to the mix. But still...

  The simple motions of making up her bed helped steady her somewhat. Once she’d finished, she clicked out the light and crawled under the comforter, hoping she would slip into sleep quickly.
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  * * *

  For one heart-stopping moment, when Lucy had appeared in his bedroom doorway, her hair tousled, her eyes still drowsy from sleep, Jason had thought she’d come to ask him to make love to her. With his body instantly aroused, he hadn’t been sure he could resist.

  Damn, he knew he shouldn’t touch her—he’d recited a hundred reasons a thousand times at least. But he was only a man, and he wanted her more than he’d ever wanted any woman, anywhere.

  Now that she’d gone, he resisted the urge to put the laptop aside and go after her. Nothing good would come of that.

  Shutting down the laptop, he turned off the light and got ready for bed. They both needed to get out of this cabin. He’d take her for a drive, maybe into Colorado Springs, and hopefully that would clear the air.

  It had to.

  The next morning, she clapped her hands together in delight when he told her his plans as they sat at the table enjoying their coffee. Then, she instantly sobered. “What if someone sees me?”

  “We’re going to a larger city, not Cedar. I’m thinking we’ll drive into Colorado Springs.”

  Considering him, she finally nodded. “Do you think we can get in to see your doctor friend? I’m tired of not understanding what’s going on with me.”

  “That can probably be arranged,” he told her. “I left him a message the other day and he hasn’t returned it, but that’s not unusual. He’s a busy guy. Let me call him again. It’s early enough—I should be able to catch him before he goes in to work.”

  This time, Phil picked up on the second ring. “Sorry I didn’t call you back,” he said, forgoing the usual greetings. “It’s been crazy around here. What’s up, Jason? Where are you now?”

  Jason laughed. “I’m back in Cedar.”

  “You are? Can you make it into the Springs for lunch or dinner?”

  “I can. I’m heading that way today, as a matter of fact. And I need to ask you a favor.” As simply as possible, Jason told him about Lucy.

  As Jason had expected, Phil was intrigued. “I’ve never actually met an amnesia patient. I have no idea what my schedule at the office looks like, but I’m sure I can fit her in. Any idea as to a general time?”

  Jason checked his watch. “Noon? Maybe we can go to lunch after?”

  “That’d be perfect. See you then.” Phil ended the call before Jason could even say goodbye.

  Looking up to find Lucy watching him, Jason grinned. “You’re in. He’ll see you at noon today.”

  Her answering smile lit up her face. “Thank you so much,” she said. “Maybe I can finally get some answers.”

  Then, before he could react, she reached up and kissed him.

  No doubt the quick press of her lips on his had been an impulse. The same as the way his arms came up to keep her in place. Instinct, nothing more. And when he deepened the kiss, he told himself the same thing. Drowning in the taste and feel of her, nothing rational or polite about it.

  He drank her in as if she was essential to his survival. Lost himself in her, even as she wrapped herself around him, her soft curves molding to him.

  Dangerous. He couldn’t make himself break away from her. Not yet. He wanted, needed, another minute. Just. One. More.

  Finally, she wrenched herself away from him, her chest heaving as she struggled to catch her breath. She stared at him, her eyes huge and vulnerable, and he felt his heart squeeze in his chest, just a little bit.

  “I’ll go get ready to leave,” she mumbled and rushed off toward the bathroom.

  Only when he heard the click of the door closing did he release the breath he hadn’t even been aware he’d been holding.

  “What the...” Dragging his hand through his hair, he tried to process what had just happened. He swore her taste still lingered in his mouth.

  He shook his head, too bemused to be angry at himself. Because he understood the truth. He could be careful, he could avoid even the most casual contact with her, but if she touched him, or kissed him, all bets were off. When they came together, they ignited like a match to gasoline-soaked tinder. Clearly, there wasn’t a damn thing either of them could do about it.

  He heard the sound of the shower turning on and closed his eyes. For a second, all he could think of was how she must have looked right now, naked, with water sluicing off her smooth skin and full breasts. His body stirred and he cursed, angry at himself.

  Briefly, he considered going outside, just to burn off some energy. But they still needed to eat something for breakfast, and he needed his own shower before they left. Since anywhere beside Cedar was a considerable drive, especially without knowing the road conditions, he needed to stick around.

  So instead of busying himself with firewood or snow shoveling, he set about scrambling eggs and making toast. He made them both a plate and ate his standing up.

  She emerged a moment later, her expression once again composed. Avoiding his gaze, she went to her duffel bag and started rummaging around in it. He took that as his signal to go get ready himself.

  “I made breakfast,” he said as he headed off toward the bathroom. “Your plate is on the counter. I already ate.”

  “Thank you.” Her soft response tempted him to wait, to turn himself around and park himself in the kitchen so he could watch her eat. Instead, he gathered up his rapidly shredding willpower and marched off to take his shower.

  * * *

  Once the door closed behind Jason, Lucy allowed her shoulders to sag. She didn’t know what the heck was wrong with her. No matter how strictly she talked to herself, no matter what she resolved, the instant her skin came into contact with Jason’s, she lost her ever-loving mind.

  What had she been thinking when she kissed him? The impulsive act had nearly gotten them undressed and making fierce, passionate love. Which she had to admit, in a deep, visceral way, she wanted. Even though she knew to do so was wrong. Wasn’t it? It had to be. At least until she was fully herself.

  Eying the scrambled eggs and toast that he’d left for her, she carried her plate to the table and ate without tasting it at all. When she’d finished, she washed it down with the rest of her cold cup of coffee and then went to her duffel bag and began rummaging through it.

  Due to the ever-present, unsubstantiated feeling of being in danger, she insisted on wearing a disguise. Or as much of one as she could cobble together with what little she had.

  The wig that had been tucked inside the duffel bag seemed to look relatively natural. Long blond hair didn’t feel like her, but then she didn’t have any real idea what she did and didn’t like.

  After securing the wig on her head, she eyed herself in the bathroom mirror. It felt heavy and unnatural, but she supposed if she pretended it was a hat, she’d be fine. Since she didn’t have bobby pins to keep the wig in place, she borrowed one of Jason’s old baseball caps and made a ponytail, pulling that through the back part of the cap.

  Since she had makeup, she put on foundation and powder, a tiny bit of mascara, and then chose a lip gloss over a lipstick, using the small mirror that came with the powder compact.

  When Jason emerged from the bathroom and caught sight of her, he stopped short. “Lucy?” he asked, incredulous. “You look...wow.”

  Not sure whether to take that as a compliment or not, she shrugged and put her hands on her hips. “What do you really think?” she asked.

  “You look great, but then you looked great before. What’s with the disguise?”

  Haltingly, she tried to explain. She must have done a pretty decent job, because the confusion in his face cleared.

  “I get it,” he said. “I just need a few minutes and I’ll be ready to go.”

  When he returned, he held out a pair of oversize aviator sunglasses. “Here. These will protect your eyes from the brightness of the snow and help with your disguise,” he told her.

  Thanking
him, she tried them on. “Well?”

  “You look totally different,” he said.

  Grateful, she nodded. “I appreciate you doing all this for me,” she said. “I mean letting me stay here, feeding me and trying to help me regain my memory.”

  “Stop.” He held up one hand, his expression fierce. “Thanks are not necessary. I’m just doing what any human being with an ounce of compassion would do. Understand?”

  “You have a big heart,” she said. “I might not know my own name or where I came from, but I do know not everyone would be so kind.” She didn’t like to think of what could have happened to her if Jason had been a different kind of man.

  Odd how there were certain general things she knew, while there were so many more specific recollections she didn’t have. She hated not knowing how long it would be until she was herself again, whoever that might be.

  Maybe this doctor would have some answers.

  “Are you ready?” he asked.

  “I’m ready,” she said cheerfully, determined to be as upbeat as possible. “I can’t wait to get some answers.”

  She followed him out to his Jeep and climbed in the passenger side and secured the seat belt around her.

  Since she didn’t remember arriving at the cabin, she studied the landscape with interest as they drove the winding road down the mountain. She didn’t see another house for several minutes. “You really are isolated, aren’t you?”

  “Yep.” He shrugged. “I own a lot of acreage up here.”

  “Really? How much?”

  “Fifty-six acres. Most of that particular hill.”

  She gaped at him. “Wow.”

  “It’s been in my family for years,” he told her. “We used to come here on vacation when I was a kid. I bought it from my mom a few years ago and did some upgrades. Now, it’s my home. In between traveling all over the world for my job.”

  “Do you miss it when you’re gone?”

  He didn’t answer immediately, instead appearing to concentrate on the road. When he finally glanced her way, his expression seemed rueful. “You know what? I really do. Not only the cabin and the land, but the community in Cedar. It’s a great little town. Small enough that everyone knows everyone. We all look out for one another. It’s exactly what I need after leaving some of the hellholes I spend time in.”