The Wolf Siren Page 14

  Head down, the pup slunk back into the bushes, apparently to do exactly that.

  “I thought young children weren’t able to shape-shift yet,” Lilly said.

  “That’s right, they can’t.” Kane nodded. “But he’s not that young. I don’t know if you noticed, but the smaller kids didn’t accompany everyone into the forest. One of the parents stayed back to watch them. Usually in order to change, one has to be at least a preteen. Reggie’s twelve.”

  As she and Lucas had been the first time. Lilly had never forgotten the first time she’d changed. She and her twin brother had been amazed and excited. They’d spent the first few years learning what their wolf selves could do. Thinking back, she was surprised they’d been able to keep it secret for as long as they had. Especially given the depth of Jacob Gideon’s hatred for what he called demons.

  A fierce longing seized her. How she wished she could simply step away, shed her clothing, drop to the ground and change into a wolf. Like she and Lucas used to do when they were teenagers. Back then, she’d found joy in the other part of her.

  No so much now. Because her wolf had been distorted, ruined, until the beast had become a monster of death and ugliness. Changing no longer brought happiness, just agony and rage.

  The thing inside her snarled, feeling her hatred. She snarled right back. She wanted it gone and her wolf returned. Now. Being among Kane’s family, this town, a group of other people who were like her, who celebrated what they were, made her long to be able to share in their joy.

  Fists curled so tightly her fingernails dug into her palms, she tried to move, to break away from Kane so she could make a run for the cabin.

  Instead, Kane grabbed her arm. Startled, she rounded on him, letting down her inner guard for just a fraction of a second. A crack but enough for her monster to try to slip through.

  Again her bones began to lengthen and shift painfully. She screamed, a shrill cry of pain.

  “Lilly.” Hauling her against him, he put his face so close to hers that his breath tickled her cheek. “Sweetheart, it’s all right. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

  Barely conscious, she moaned. She couldn’t let her beast hurt him. She wouldn’t. With everything that she was, she hung on to this thought, clinging to him.

  “Get me inside,” she managed to croak.

  Just like that, he scooped her up in his arms and, leaving the picnic basket behind, headed back the way they’d originally come.

  Chapter 10

  Once he reached the cabin, he stopped, breathing hard. Lilly had gone so still in his arms, he feared she’d lost consciousness.

  Carefully, he set her down in the porch chair. Though she slumped a little to the side, her amazing blue eyes were open, though fixed on nothing.

  “Lilly?” Keeping his movements slow and gentle, he stroked her cheek. “Are you okay?”

  She blinked, stirring as though awakening after a deep sleep. “Hey, Kane.” A tiny frown creased her brow. She gasped and sat up, remembering. “Did I...”

  “No. You did not.”

  Heaving a sigh of relief, she stood, appearing shaky. “I’m sorry I ruined your picnic.”

  “You didn’t.” He managed a smile, aware he couldn’t reveal how badly she’d worried him. “We got to eat, that’s the important part.”

  “What about the champagne? And the basket?”

  He shrugged. “I left it in the woods. I’ll go back and get it later.”

  “Maybe you’d better get it now. You don’t want a bunch of drunken wild animals roaming your land.” Her tentative smile made him realize she was trying to joke with him.

  “It’s almost dark,” he told her. “Why don’t we get you inside.”

  “And then you’ll go retrieve it?”

  Holding the door open, he stood aside to let her pass. “I don’t know if I should leave you here by yourself.”

  She waved away his concern. “The danger has passed. I’ll be fine. In fact, if you want to join your family on their hunt, go ahead. I’m just going to clean up and read some before I go to bed.”

  “No,” he said, more to dispel the instant flash of carnal images at the thought of her going to bed. “I’ll run out and get the basket and the bottle and be right back. Shouldn’t take me more than a couple of minutes.”

  One elegant shoulder lifted in a shrug. Even this, he found sensual.

  “Suit yourself,” she said, barely hiding a yawn. “I’m going to go change into something more comfortable.”

  The old, tired line took on new meaning when she said it in that silky, sensual voice of hers. For a second he forgot what he was about to do and simply stood, staring at her.

  She took a step back, making him realize the raw desire had most likely shown in his face.

  “I’ll be right back,” he said brusquely, and then turned and headed right back out the door before he did something he was going to regret.

  He could only hope like hell he had himself under control by the time he got back. He’d pocketed the flashlight, so he used that to retrace their earlier steps.

  Once he’d gone deeper into the woods, the tell-tale signs of his family’s hunt revealed exactly how close they’d come to him and Lilly. They’d killed something large, a deer from the looks of it, and dragged the carcass away. The bloodstains and bits of bone testified to the fact that they’d already begun to feed.

  He had no idea where they were now, but he couldn’t smell or hear them. Oh, he could follow the scent of the deer, but right now he just wanted to get the damn basket and champagne and get back to Lilly.

  He found everything where he’d dropped it, though the champagne had run out of the bottle into the ground. Gathering it all together, he hurried back to the cabin.

  As he approached, the yellow light beaming from the windows appeared welcoming. His heart—dammit—started to pound as he pictured Lilly in whatever “get into something comfortable” meant to her. Though she’d probably been talking about a T-shirt and jeans, his imagination took him to some other interesting outfits.

  More proof that he was acting like a fool.

  Opening the front door, he stopped just inside. Curled up on the couch, Lilly appeared engrossed in one of the books on Shifter history he’d given her.

  She looked up, her slow smile taking his breath away. “This is good stuff,” she said, brandishing the book. “I had no idea. I wish I could share this with Lucas.”

  “I’m sure your brother has learned a little about his heritage,” he said, smiling back. “But in case he hasn’t, we can always let him borrow it.”

  This seemed to reassure her. “Thanks.”

  “Are you ready to call it a night and try and get some sleep?”

  She stood, absently running her fingers thought her long, luxurious wealth of hair. Remaining motionless for a moment, she seemed to struggle with her own emotions. “I don’t know what happened out there,” she began.

  “No worries,” he reassured her, aware he had his own struggles to face. “And no pressure, either.”

  Finally, she nodded and looked up, a grateful smile curving lips that begged for his kiss. Again, he had to shut his thoughts down. He had to figure out how to stop wanting her, but that was his problem, not hers.

  “There’s more I want to teach you,” he continued. “In addition to the basic self-defense moves we’ve practiced, I want to teach you how to feel comfortable with a gun.”

  She eyed him, not protesting, despite her uncertain expression. “I’m not sure I can—”

  “You’ll do fine,” he assured her.

  Still she seemed doubtful. “How do you know these things? I mean, you said you were a veterinarian by trade.”

  “And a Pack Protector. I’m in the reserves. Just like the U.S. military. And I received extensive training.” He smiled. “Plus I occasionally teach a woman’s self-defense course in Fort Worth.”

  Nodding, she appeared impressed, though he found her poker-faced expression
difficult to read.

  “Where do you go to shoot a gun? Are we driving to a shooting range or something?”

  “Nope. The nearest shooting range is fifty miles away,” he told her. “There’s a meadow where I used to go at sunrise to do my tai chi. It’s big and flat. We’ll set up some targets and shoot there.”

  A worried frown creased her brow. “When?” she asked.

  “We’ll play it by ear. Maybe tomorrow morning. Pretty early, before the heat of the day sets in.”

  * * *

  Lilly lay awake in her bed long after she’d turned out the light. An entire new world had opened up for her since Kane had taken her away from Seattle. Remembering her performance in the self-defense training, she felt a flush of pride.

  A gun was a different matter. She wasn’t sure how she felt about Kane’s desire that she learn to handle one. She decided to simply, as Kane had put it, play it by ear.

  And thinking of Kane, with his large, capable hands on her body, she became aware of a low thrum of desire. She finally fell asleep aching with need.

  That night, instead of pleasant dreams, the old nightmares returned. She found herself back in Sanctuary, strapped to the metal laboratory table as the doctors came at her with needles and knives.

  Somewhere in the dark of the night she awoke gasping, drenched in perspiration. She knew they’d come for her in darkness. Lying in her bed, alone and aching for Kane, she felt a frisson of fear. Who knew how these acolytes of the church of Sanctuary would manage to find her and worse, what they wanted to do to her. Had she been slated for death, a decree given by the man who’d claimed to be her father, while he served time in prison?

  He’d certainly been furious enough for that.

  Grabbing her small flashlight, she got out of the bed and opened her door, taking care to move quietly so she wouldn’t disturb Kane.

  Straight through the living room she went, unlocking the front door and stepping outside on to the front porch. She dropped into the chair, breathing deeply of the fresh night air. The waning moon provided enough light that she was able to turn off her flashlight.

  At first, the crickets had gone silent when she emerged. They started up again in full force, which made her smile. She felt the tension leach out of her, enjoying the energy of nature. For the first time since she’d arrived in Leaning Tree, she didn’t allow the monster inside her to ruin the moment. She’d suffered enough in the past and now, thanks to Kane, she’d begun to step outside of her shell. She liked the flush of confidence learning self-defense had given, liked even more the heady sensuality she experienced when she was around Kane.

  As if thinking about him had summoned him, the front door creaked open and Kane emerged. He had a serious case of bed head, which somehow made him look edgy and even more sexy.

  “Hey,” he greeted her, taking the chair next to hers. “You couldn’t sleep, either?”

  She gave him a rueful smile. “Oh, I could sleep. It was the nightmares that got me up.”

  When he nodded rather than pressing her for details, she silently thanked him. Reliving the terrors of those dreams wasn’t pleasant, whether awake or asleep.

  “We need to talk,” he said, his deep voice serious. “I’m coming to understand that there’s a lot more to you than I, or anyone else, realizes.”

  “I warned you I was messed up.” She tried to keep it light, and failed miserably. “Fifteen years of captivity will do that to a person.”

  He took her hand, stunning her into temporary silence. “It was more than just captivity, I know. You mentioned they experimented on you.”

  Her nod was the only answer she could manage.

  “Do you know if they were...successful with any of the experiments?”

  “Successful?” The concept was so foreign to her, the word might almost have been in another language. “I know what they wanted to do with me.” And what they’d tried to turn her into. She thought of what the doctors had called the Siren, and realized, yes, they’d succeeded. At least in that.

  As if she’d spoken out loud, he leaned closer. “Lilly, I need you to tell me what happened to me when you sang.”

  Once, she would have hung her head. In fact, the person she used to be would have stammered out an apology. But this was not her fault. None of it was. So she lifted her chin and looked Kane directly in the eyes.

  “I don’t know.” She shrugged, refusing to allow herself to feel dejected. “It had to be because of what they did to me at Sanctuary. I don’t understand all the technical aspects. I just know they tried to make modification after modification to me. To my DNA, my body, my spirit and my beast. If they could have figured out a way to get to my soul, I have no doubt they would have.”

  Still holding her hand, he nodded, waiting for her to continue.

  She shrugged, refusing to give in to her embarrassment. “I don’t know how or why, but apparently when I sing, my voice is like the mythical sirens’, compelling men. As it did you.”

  Narrow-eyed, he stared. “Then why can’t I remember? Even if you could make me do something, you shouldn’t be able to make me forget.”

  Now she did look down, knowing how much this proud, strong man would hate what he’d momentarily become under her spell. “I don’t know. But you kissed me.” Her face heated, which meant she was most likely a fiery red. “And you wanted to do more, but I was able to stop you.”

  “Stop me? You say that like I tried to force myself on you or something.”

  She let her silence be her answer.

  His lowered brows told her what he thought of that.

  Watching him as he wrestled with this knowledge actually brought her physical pain, low under her breastbone.

  Because that sensation felt unbearably uncomfortable, she yanked her hand free, pushed herself up out of the chair and went back inside the cabin, leaving him alone on the porch.

  * * *

  Still trying to make sense of her words, Kane didn’t react. He was too busy trying to figure out what the hell had happened when she sang. Nothing she’d said made any sense. Even if her singing could somehow intensify the desire that already simmered constantly in his veins, how could her voice make him lose all memory of what he’d done?

  She’d hinted that he’d tried to force himself on her.

  No, no way. He wasn’t that kind of man. He didn’t force women to do anything, not ever.

  Too restless for sleep, he got up and followed her back into the cabin.

  She stood in the kitchen, her back to him, the lights still off.

  “You know, you’re eventually going to have to change.” As he spoke, he flicked on the light switch.

  She spun around to face him. He didn’t miss the spark of panic that flashed into her eyes.

  “Why?” Crossing her arms, she lifted her chin. “Are you punishing me now for what happened when I sang?”

  Shocked, he recoiled. “Of course not.”

  “Then why? I don’t see the need.”

  “Lilly.” He softened his voice, aware that what he had to say next might be news to her. “Every Shifter has to change periodically. If they don’t, they’ll go insane.”

  To his surprise, she greeted this statement with a short bark of humorless laughter. “Insane? I think that ship already sailed. It’s too late for me, Kane.”

  “Don’t say that.” He couldn’t help himself; even though she wasn’t looking for sympathy, he pulled her into his arms. Once he had her, inhaling the sweet scent of her freshly shampooed hair, he wondered how he’d ever let her go.

  Lilly decided that for him. Pushing him away, she fixed him with a glare. “I’m not joking.”

  “I didn’t think you were. But still, you’re a long way from the kind of insanity I’m talking about.”

  From the way she cocked her head, he could tell she didn’t believe him.

  “I’ve seen it,” he continued quietly, aching now that he no longer had her in his arms. “People driven so mad they were reduce
d to rabid beasts, foaming at the mouth and tearing at their own skin with their fingernails. And not only were they a danger to themselves, but to others.”

  Something in his voice must have gotten through to her. Sorrow softened her expression as she relaxed her stance. “How is it possible that you’ve seen such things?”

  “The Protectors,” he told her, remembered horrors still clutching him. “Once, not too long ago, these Shifters were called Ferals. Those that lived outside society for whatever reason. Our task was to hunt them and bring them in.”

  “For what?” Now she watched him as though she expected another monster to emerge. “Please tell me you didn’t experiment and torture them like the people of Sanctuary did.”

  “Of course not.” He sighed. “This was a dark period in our organization’s history. Corrupt and evil men had gained power, and they overstepped the bounds of decency. But Protectors revolted against them, because by our very name we knew we’d been charged with Protecting our own kind, nothing more, nothing less.”

  She still hadn’t moved. “What did you do to them, these Ferals?”

  “They were offered a chance to be rehabilitated.” This said, he prayed she didn’t ask about the others, who refused this offer.

  “Define rehabilitated.”

  “They were given medical and mental-health care and once healed, were trained to reassimilate themselves back into society.”

  Staring past her, he remembered the chaos, the unnecessary bloodshed, and the brave revolt. “Now our organization has been cleaned up. The corrupt officials were arrested and stood trial.”

  Though she nodded, her gaze still appeared troubled. “What about the ones that refused?”

  Crap.

  “Refused?” he asked carefully. “That was an extremely rare occurrence.”

  “Still, it happened, right?”

  Reluctant, he nodded.

  “So what did you do to them?”

  He wanted to balk, wished he could lie. But the one thing above all others that Lilly deserved was honesty, whether she liked the answer or not.

  “The directive given at the time was extermination.”